Dog Physics Lesson One

Dog Physics Lesson One
"Dogs at rest tend to remain at rest..."

Tuesday, June 15, 2010

The Demise of Big Butter Jesus



Although I have done my best to resist the temptation to write mindless drivel about silly daily occurrences, I have been swept away on the tide of current events, or more precisely, event, this morning, and find I must say something about last night's demise of our local landmark of dubious distinction, made even more famous by comedian Heywood Banks' song of the same name, Big Butter Jesus.

As you know if you live anywhere within 5000 miles of southwest Ohio, "Big Butter Jesus" is....WAS....the monumental sculpture of Christ rising out of a farm-pond sized body of water (Oh. My husband informs me that this pond is properly known as a "reflectionary pool." Sorry...)in front of the Solid Rock Church just off I-75 south of Monroe, bearing a cross that I presume to be symbolic, since in the scheme of things it is way out of proportion - much too small to have hung a human figure of that size from...from which to have hung a human figure of that size, that is. Pardon my dangling participles but I'm still in shock.

After a severe thunderstorm last night, and a tragic or fortuitous (depending on your point of view) lightening strike, all that currently remains of the work is the metal framework still straining skyward.

I kind of like it that way. "King of Kings" might now be left as is and renamed "Technology Triumphs" (although in reality it was Mother Nature who had the last laugh last night). It looks like some extra from the Pixar film Wall*E.

Please don't flame me. I mean no disrespect to the spirit in which the sculpture was erected, and by no means to the faithful of that particular church. I'm Catholic and attended Catholic grade school so I was spoon-fed more religious images and icons before lunch every week day than films in which Charlton Heston played biblical figures; I'm no stranger to all sorts of depictions of Our Lord. In fact, I'm pretty sure that the image of Christ dying horribly on a cross displayed in each and every Catholic grade school classroom I ever did time in as a kid (there I go again. "In which I ever did time..."etc) is in large part responsible for that phenomenon known as "Catholic Guilt" since the good sisters holding court in those establishments wasted no time in bashing our impressionable young minds with the knowledge that "Christ died for YOUR sins." Eeeshh. But I digress....

Pyromaniac that I am, I was quite disheartened to learn that I had missed a fire of such epic (and symbolic?) proportions, but fortunately...dare I say it? - technology triumphs, and here it is already this morning on You Tube. Wow. Can you imagine standing at your window looking out at the lightening storm from your home in the area and seeing lightening hit that thing? Can you imagine being the pastor of the Solid Rock Church and watching it happen? Holy....well, far better humorists than I are probably already attempting to re-create THAT scenario. Have at it, guys.

As has already been pointed out - but I can't resist mentioning - the nearby Hustler store as well as a number of other religious edifices in the area were spared. What, we must ask ourselves, does this all mean?

The local paper reported this morning that plans were underway anyway to "refurbish" the statue this year. What (I also must ask myself) does this mean in light of THAT news? What message was God sending? "Here, lemme help you with the trash disposal on that project." *FOOM!!!!* "Now just sweep up the ash and carry on..."

Or maybe something else. But I'm going to refrain from commenting on the quality of the work (except to say that I use that term loosely...).

I am reminded of the concept that negative publicity is STILL publicity. I predict fortune will rise like a phoenix out of these ashes. Donations are probably already pouring in from all corners of the globe (is that a contradiction in terms?) to help rebuild. Donations which, I might add, might be better put to use helping needy residents in the area. I'm just sayin'...

Let's see. This is June 15th. I have to confess, I'm really curious to see what the whole thing looks like in about...three days, if you know what I mean. Stay tuned.

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